The Nerdy News Blog - November 20th, 2010

Forgive me, folks, for failing to write up last week's Nerdy News, so here we go for what happened this week.

FOX Announces That Fringe Will Be Moved to Fridays

 Normally, I wouldn't find a change of day and time for a show to be anything remotely newsworthy. But let's take a look at the facts here. Fact: Fringe is a science fiction show on FOX with critical acclaim that's currently on Thursday nights. Fact: Starting on January 28th, it will be on Fridays. Fact: Firefly was a science fiction show on FOX with critical acclaim that aired on Fridays and was quickly canceled. Fact: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles was a science fiction show that aired on FOX that was moved to Fridays in its second season and was quickly canceled.
Opinion: Oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crap oh crapohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrapohcapOHCRAP!
FOX might as well have put out a press release that said we're thinking about canceling another awesome show because we're a bunch of morons.

Cryptic Studios and CBS Will Let The Fans Design The Next Enterprise

I realize I'm probably the only person you know who plays Star Trek Online, and hell, I don't even play it as much anymore. But I think this next bit is pretty cool. The game's developer, Cryptic Studios, along with Star Trek license holder CBS Studios and Intel have announced a contest that asks for fans to design the next starship Enterprise. I'm assuming it will be the Enterprise-F, since, according to the game's timeline, the Enterprise-E had a significantly longer life span than some of the other ships in its line. The grand prize is kind of lame, though - an Alienware laptop, the collector's edition of Star Trek Online along with a lifetime membership, the new Enterprise will appear in STO and you'll get a replica of your design. Personally, I'd rather have the replica and royalties for the use of my design. Oh well. The contest starts on December 9th. Check here for details.

 Darren Aronofsky To Direct The Wolverine

 That's right. The guy who directed head trips and arftsy flicks like Requiem for a Dream, Pi, The Fountain, and The Wrestler, is directing the sequel to the abysmal X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Aronofsky has worked with big screen Wolvie Hugh Jackman on The Fountain and it would seem that it was Jackman himself that got him the job. One of the things Aronofsky has done already is to change the title from something that probably would have been awful, like X-Men Kinda Origins: Wolverine Goes To Hollywood, to the simple title, The Wolverine. Supposedly, Aronofsky is looking to really separate his film from the Gavin Hood-directed nightmare that gave us magic adamantium memory-erasing bullets and the horribly realized Wade Wilson/Deadpool. He's called it a "stand alone" film, that "isn't connected" to its predecessor. Frankly, I don't see how that's possible since you still have Hugh Jackman playing Logan (though I actually still think he's great in the role). But combine this with the fact that they're rebooting Wade Wilson's origins for Deadpool, which should film soon if Ryan Reynolds' schedule ever frees up, and the craziness that seems to be involved with X-Men: First Class, and it's pretty obvious that FOX doesn't give a rat's ass about maintaining continuity in its X-Men film universe.


Oh, and for your amusement here's an image from a mid-90's Star Trek/X-Men crossover comic. I actually own a copy of it.

Yeah, that's Spock owning Wolverine with a Vulcan Nerve Pinch.

Win.

Clawing at Wolverine

Haha! I'm so clever with titles, aren't I?

(Warning, there will be some spoilers.)

So, last Friday I went off to see X-Men Origins: Wolverine with my good friend Megan. Admittedly I had fairly mixed expectations. I saw some of the trailers and set pics early on, thinking that it probably wasn't going to be that good of a movie. Then, after the famous Internet leak of a work-print, I heard a lot of positive buzz and I started to get excited. But then, but Thursday evening, I saw where the film's rating on RottenTomatoes.com was a pitiful 37%. So I really wasn't sure what to expect.
Wolverine ends up a film that starts fairly strong and then descends into cliche and some glaring logic problems.
The opening, an altered but relatively true to the comics take on the emergence of Wolverine (James Logan in the movie, though the character was originally named James Howlett in the Origin comic which this scene is taken from) was great. It's followed by a spectacular look at Logan and Victor Creed (later known as Sabretooth) as they fight through every major war from the Civil War until Vietnam during the opening credits. This sequence shows especially well how Logan and Victor start to grow apart based on their individual taste, or distaste in Logan's case, for violence and death. A montage used to show characterization is a somewhat rare thing in a film, so I appreciated its use.
After some scenes meant to get Logan and Victor on William Stryker's Team X, there is a fun action sequence where the members of Team X show off their talents. Ryan Reynolds shines here in his delivery of Wade Wilson (the future "Merc with a Mouth," Deadpool). Then some nice, if dragging, scenes with Logan working as lumberjack, putting his life behind him with a pretty wife.

And upon the death of that wife, it just goes downhill with a giant Hugh Jackman-yelled "NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Literally, from that point, the film delves into cliche and horrible logic problems. As if the Episode III-Darth Vader-"Where's Padme?"-reaction at his wife's death wasn't enough, through the course of the film we see a 1964 Harley-Davidson with Wolverine atop bursting out of an exploding barn, that same motorcycle inexplicably survive direct hits from a .50 caliber machine gun, and a walk into the sunset near the end (though it does have a nice little twist).

The one thing that bothered me more than any was the glaring plot hole caused by Logan, Victor and Remy Lebau (Gambit). The film makes it clear that Gambit would like to see Victor dead. Logan, who also wants Victor dead, approaches Gambit for help but Gambit sees that Logan wears similar dog tags to Victor's and therefore doesn't trust him. Logan exits the building to find Victor. Gambit follows him out and his behind Logan when Logan elbows him the face, apparently knocking him out. Logan and Victor fight and just as Logan looks ready to finish Victor off... Gambit is suddenly running across the rooftops and jumps off and delivers a big kinetic shockwave to both Victor and Logan, preventing Logan from dealing the obvious death he was about to bestow on Victor. And then, Logan and Gambit both simply let Victor walk off after that.
How did Gambit suddenly get on the roof tops? No idea. Why did Gambit prevent the death of someone he wanted dead? No idea. Oh, and why did Logan just let Victor walk off? Again, no idea.

And let's not go into the mockery they made of the origins and powers of Deadpool, or the ridiculously useless boxing match between Logan and Blob, or the totally inaccurate depictions of Emma Frost and Silverfox (For one, those two aren't sisters!). Whereas many other Marvel comic films have managed to streamline the origins and cinematic translations of the characters with a fair amount of finesse, Wolverine is haphazardly done, as if a ten-year-old was sitting around saying "Wouldn't it be cool if Deadpool had laser eyes?!". The film breaks so far from the source material that it offends Marvel fans by default.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine, quite simply put, is a mess. I couldn't give anyone a recommendation to see it. Though, once it's on DVD, making a drinking game around it could be really fun - like every time there is a total logic problem, a cliche or a plot hole, you take a drink. Yep, that would get you hellaciously drunk.

- Nate